Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Fire Makes Me Panic

Last night, the dogs were outside going to the bathroom and I was standing on the deck. I look over at our neighbors house (who have a long transom window directly in eyeshot) and I see a red flicker. Then I hear a house alarm.

Below are the sequence of events that occurred after I thought my neighbor’s house was on fire:
  • I immediately did a double take of the flicker and was certain that it was fire. 
  • Did a triple take and was 200% sure that it was moving up their living room wall. 
  • I kept my eye on the fire while trying to get back into my house…still looking at the fire…knocked on the brick – that was wrong…still looking at the fire…tried to turn the deadbolt – incorrect…finally grabbed the lever and pulled it. (By this time, Shane is standing at the door wondering what the hell is going on.) 
  • Stacy: “Shane! Call the cops! The neighbor’s house is on fire! Come look!”
  • Shane: “What?!?!”
  • I run back outside. I employ the same door opening techniques to the gate on my deck…fail. I jump over the gate and then realize that I have stairs on the other side…so I grab the railing on the way down, swivel and almost break my wrist.
  • Shane comes back outside, “Are you sure that it’s fire, before I call?”
  • Now that I’m ground level (mind you – wearing PJ’s and socks and having just ninja’d my way off of my deck) I can see the fire clearly. 
  • Oh wait, that’s not fire. What is it? A freaking red, mylar Valentine’s Day heart hanging from the ceiling. 
  • My response to Shane: “S**t…no, it’s just Valentine’s Day decorations. Damn it – I really thought that place was on fire!” Commence full body shakes from adrenaline.
  • Stacy: “Well, 'Operates well under pressure'…F.”
  • Shane: “Yeah, you kind of freaked out there for a minute…”
Moral of the story: Always look twice. Or in my case – five times.

5 comments:

  1. Just imagine the computer screen is the fire.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LPC_TYnFec

    Also, a little video about fire!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IS7Og1zvdy8

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  2. OMG - I'm dying laughing right now - Stacy that is the funniest story I've heard in a long time...
    It's time to add mylar balloons to your "makes me panic" list!
    I'll be sure to not show up at your house unannounced, with balloons!

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  3. that is hilarious!! I'm sorry - I'm scared of fire too - but too funny that it was a balloon! Really it's your neighbor's faul - who the eff decorates with balloons?

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  4. Freakin' funniest story I've heard in a long time!!

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  5. LOL - glad you guys all got a laugh! I looked at the balloon again last night and honestly have no idea how I mistook it for fire...sheesh.

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